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'Anybody seen A.C.?'
Who else could it be...
OJ Simpson Fuckin' OJ... If you somehow manage to get acquitted of double-murder despite the fact that everyone on earth knows you did it, wouldn't you keep your nose clean? Wouldn't you make absolutely certain that no judge ever gets the chance to exact revenge for the single most publicized miscarriage of justice in American history? Of course you would.
But not O.J. Simpson. He sets up his own personal sting operation aimed at a guy who had stolen some of his memorabilia. Among it, priceless items like a photo of O.J. and J. Edgar Hoover (?!). His plan was to organize a meeting with the thieves in a Las Vegas hotel, and upon seeing his stolen property to take it back, by force if necessary.
His brilliant sting didn't exactly go as planned:
First of all, O.J. has been watching too many gangster movies. Motherfucker! You think you can steal my shit, and sell it?!" Do you realize O.J. is 60-years-old? He sounds like some idiot thug teenager.
Secondly, he is brandishing a firearm while doing all of this! Now, I'm not a lawyer, but if I were, one of the first things I would tell all of my clients is to never break into a Las Vegas hotel room with a gun. As surprising as it may sound, armed robbery in a casino is not looked upon kindly by the authorities in Clark County.
Earlier this week, Nevada District Attorney charged Simpson, with multiple felonies, including criminal conspiracy, kidnapping, assault, robbery, and using a deadly weapon. He faces up to 60 years in prison.
What robs in Vegas stays in Vegas.
Of course Court TV jumped on the story. The chance to spend months, maybe years, rehashing the grizzly murders that launched their network made dicks hard in every office at the cable channel. "Entertainment Tonight" sent a familiar, if unpleasant face to cover the story: former prosecutor Marsha Clark. It's like 1989 all over again. Paula Abdul is probably preparing a comeback.
Watching these sharks circle for the chance to dig up Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman and fuck their corpses for profit is despicable, but if O.J. ends up spending the rest of his life in prison, it'll be worth it.
Donovan McNabb Earlier this week in an interview with HBO's James Brown, struggling Philly QB, Donovan McNabb, said that black quarterbacks face more pressure and more criticism than white quarterbacks. Whether this is true or not is debatable. What is obvious is that Donovan McNabb should keep his mouth shut about it.
Philly fans boo everyone, but I don't remember the crowd cheering when he was injured last year. I do remember that happening to two white quarterbacks: Chad Pennington two weeks ago and to Tim Couch a few years ago. The race card just doesn't hold up. Certainly there is a history of prejudice at the QB position, but in today's NFL you'd be hard pressed to make that case.
More importantly, McNabb is in no position to make this claim. You make millions of dollars to play a game and to deal with the criticism and pressure of playing QB in the NFL. He's never played in any other city, and any attempt to compare the pressure on one guy vs. another is purely speculation. Even a completely unbiased observer would be hard pressed to make a meaningful comparison of the pressure on two QBs. There are just too many factors, and most would come way before race: the city, team expectations, contract, character, history, age, team's offensive philosophy, ability of surrounding skill players, etc.
To be honest, I like McNabb. He seems like a genuinely good guy who is usually pretty funny in interviews. Being clever was working for him. He should take Tyler Durdan's advice and, "Stick with it then." What he shouldn't do is complain about the criticism he's getting when he 1-6 in his last seven games. Maybe, just maybe, it isn't because he's black.
Posts: 2923 Rank: 1 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:28:43 PM
Good job. I enjoyed it thoroughly.
Whilst I do not know much about sports. I know my city. and the last thing McNAbb should do is pull the race card. We will continue to boo him until he quits or leaves. no body likes a whiner.
Posts: 831 Rank: 11 Joined:
12/14/2006
Location:
Washington, DC
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:41:51 PM
I have to stick by my nougat ‘cause we went to The 'Cuse together...but his comments echoed what Grimace (Limbaugh) said a couple years ago. Pretty fucking hypocritical.
Here in my client's building the urinals in the john have a fancy little unrinal cake holder. Guess what the company's name is that they deemed it appropriate to stamp large as life on top of the cake holder?
Spartan.
Yup...so now i get to piss on spartan whenever i get the urge.
Posts: 115 Rank: 2140 Joined:
7/23/2007
Location:
Albany, NY
Posted: 9/20/2007 1:57:36 PM
Sorry all, it's been a busy week. Because no one cares about my opinion, I'll offer it--that article on the Dawg Pound was superb. I really thought Ocho Cinco was going to be stabbed in there. I know those scumbags in the Black Hole would do it for the rest of football's sake. I dare him to try that shit in Heinz Field. Oh, wait, he doesn't score touchdowns there, he gets knocked out of games.
Christine, pookie...I don't know what that is in your avatar, but if it's what I think it is, I'm gonna go mess up the floor in my shower.
All quarterbacks get too much credit when winning, too much blame when losing. Not just black ones Jig.
Its not the media's fault you missed Kevin Curtis for a wide open touchdown monday night, its you doing too many Chunky soup commercials while being oppressed.
OJ's 60? That daughter might be fairly hot by now. If someone finds pics toss them up.
The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian war party. The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honor of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. Before I kill you, I grant you three requests.
What is your first request?" The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse." The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger, who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away.
Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his Back. As the Indian Chief watches,The blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse,but I will still kill you in two days.
What is your second request?"
The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, And he again whispers in the horse's ear.
As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon. Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, More attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed. "You are indeed a man of many talents, but I will still kill you tomorrow. "What is your last request?" The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse,....alone."
The Chief is curious, but he agrees, And Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent. Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears,looks him Square in the eye and says,
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Donovan McNabb
