LOS ANGELES, CA- During a recent mid-season taping of The WBs Blue Collar TV, line producers were stunned when in-studio gauges indicated that the show had reached the Lowest Common Denominator. While the sketch-comedy show starring Jeff Foxworthy, Larry The Cable Guy and Bill Engvall has never been regarded as refined and sophisticated programming, those on the production team believed this to be the first instance in television history that a broadcast had bottomed out at low-brow critical mass, reaching the Lowest Common Denominator possible.
Associate Producer Glenn Einhorn was the first to notice that the show had hit absolute zero on the L.C.D. meter. It was a normal skit, nothing that seemed to be out of the ordinary, said a visibly shaken Einhorn. Just another one of our Hick Husband and His Frustrated Wife set-upsstandard fare. I thought something was strange right around the part in the skit where Larrys character asked his wife what the number for 9-1-1 was. I thought it was just a power surge.
But right after Larry took his wifes advice and dialed information to get the number, I knew something was wrong. Einhorn pauses and collects himself. Then Larry said to the operator, Git-R-Done!!! bent over, and farted into the phone. You pretty much know what happened after that. Im still not really sure what to think.
The show, which is filmed in front of a live audience, immediately halted production while security staff evacuated the studio. Psychological professionals were quickly dispatched to the scene to treat members of the audience more adversely affected by the L.C.D. Kevin Reynolds, a vacationing advertising executive from New York who thought attending a television taping would be fun, was one of the victims.
I couldnt comprehend what I was looking at, a confused and pale Reynolds told reporters while crouched over on the sidewalk and drinking herbal tea from a thermos. He remained wrapped up in a heated blanket. I had no idea that anything could be this low-brow, this sophomoric and pathetic. It went from a joke about a dog to one about back hair to a song touting the virtues of Cheez-Whiz and hunting. Just snowballing out of control, dragging everything in its path and everyone on the audience down with it into a black abyss of anti-intellectual damnation.
When I get back to New York, Im watching my Six Feet Under-Season One DVD box-set from beginning to end.
The network quickly jumped into crisis control mode. Although known for skillfully dodging previous criticisms that Blue Collar TV and other shows such as Reba and 7th Heaven pandered to an uneducated, Biblically pacified faction of the nation, executives and top brass found it considerably harder to avoid this incidents empirical evidence.
One Horseman Short
Its one thing to pretend a problem doesnt existits quite another to deny it when the damage is out in the open for everybody to see, said a network executive who asked to remain anonymous. "People were hurt today. Where we go from here is anybodys guess.
The one thing we're certain of is that were fully aware of the damage that has been done, and are committed to ensuring a similar incident never occurs.
On a lighter note though, dont miss tomorrow nights rebroadcast of 'The Jeff Foxworthy Roast.' Its wholesome entertainment the whole family can enjoy together."
Steve is an Assbag Posted: 4/30/2005by: Player Hater Steve, you silly little micro-dick. Have you always been such a fag? Why is it that you have to post your anyonig comments all over this website. Don't you have a starwars movie to stand in line for?
Don't be such a douche What are you talking about? Posted: 4/26/2005by: Will You guys are so, so wrong. Larry the Cable Guy's redneck humor and potty jokes are TOTALLY new and inventive! They'll revolutionize the world of comedy!
Sincerely, The 1950s I disagree Pat Posted: 4/26/2005by: Ryan There is already a show with the central concept you described. The Simpsons, an absolute institution, is able to pull it off. You have to put together many aspects to make something like it work. Anyone is welcome to put their heads together and try to make something new. All I know is that I would rather drag my genatalia through broken glass than ever watch this blue collar comedy show again. We get it Posted: 4/26/2005by: dave Good Article. I agree, we fucking get it. Rednecks are middle to lower class and sometimes comical. Come on though, can the overexaggerated redneck scenarios played out by these idiots end? How is any of their shit, still drop dead funny to people? I don't get it. Yee-haw, you bastards. GOOD WORK Posted: 4/26/2005by: Alex Blagg funny stuff. Left the cable guy a message Posted: 4/26/2005by: Mike I was honestly totally unaware that things had spiraled so far out of control that this man can make a living "entertaining people" with kindergarten jokes. I followed the link to the cable guys website, I am almost ready to take advantage of my dual citizenship and move to Germany. Oh wait, over there they are oversensitive and have a huge unemployment rate. Well at least I live in the North. Still fresh Posted: 4/26/2005by: Pat I think its refreshing to see this kind of comedy being played on television: overwieght, lower middle class men with somehow attractive wives involved in daily situations. I simply don't think we have enough of this on TV. Maybe someone will come up with a show involving a guy trying to do basic household tasks but failing in a farcical kind of way, I don't think that's been done. I hate rednex Posted: 4/26/2005by: Comic Book Guy "WORST SHOW EVER" Get Er Done! Posted: 4/26/2005by: jim If you want to see more of the dacay of western Civilization you should read the postings on his website.
[url=http://www.larrythecableguy.com/]website] Amazing Posted: 4/26/2005by: Jack Wow absolute zero...they finally did it.
