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10/25/2005
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Nashville, TN
Posted: 9/23/2005
The decline of modern society began circa 1992 when kids stopped playing the computer game Oregon Trail. Some people may quibble with this fact, but they can quibble all they want, because they are wrong.
Kids today are wusses. Remember way back in the 1980s, when going to elementary school meant getting picked on, laughed at, occasionally beaten up, always getting pegged with dodgeballs and occasionally dying on the Oregon Trail? Now it means playing musical chairs with the same number of ch...
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Right on... 80's kids didn't get today's pc crap & yet managed to not run through the school with a sawed-off blasting the kids who made fun of us. You think you could play a game today where hostile Indians stole your shit or your friends let you die of dysentary- after one of my buds found out that dysentary meant you shit yourself to death you were hounded the rest of the day.
I'll bet our oil execs of today use their grade school "Lemonde Stand" experience to set the price of my fucking gasoline. Face it- we're all part of the fucking construction crew & it looks like a hot day- fuckers!
Great post that brings back "the day".
Steve K
This was great, nerd.
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Posted: 9/23/2005 8:38:26 AM
Fuckin Hilarious! I always use to skip Oregon Trail and grab the 'Odell Down Hunter.' Just as long as I avoided the damn Osprey, I was aight.
Oregon trials
I remember...
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:15:47 AM
I saw the name of this article and couldn't WAIT to read it - I LOVED that game. It was the best EVER.
Great article - you captured the spirit perfectly.
Scott
Nice
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:26:00 AM
That was fantastic. Now what about Number Crunchers?
missyg78
Another game........
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:27:41 AM
The game at my middle school in Kentucky was "Where in the world is Carmen Saniego." It was so big they even had a game show on tv for christ's sake. With those gay acapella singers. Remember those guys?
missyg78
typo!
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:28:42 AM
Sandiego- dammit
Michael C
BUDDIES!
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:35:20 AM
I'm from Lebanon, TN and this article is right on! I can't wait to forward it on. I'm still using the term "buddies" in 2005 and frequently discuss Oregon Trail when in a drunken trip down memory lane with friends.
Gwen
Gwen has died of Diptheria
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Posted: 9/23/2005 9:49:28 AM
This is my forward for the day...to all my homies who died on the Oregon Trail. Too bad, nerds.
"In fact, if you are in your twenties and don't have an Oregon Trail story from elementary school, there is a 100% chance I have no interest in talking to you."
Fabulous!
BK
lovin the 80's
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Posted: 9/23/2005 10:24:03 AM
that is awesome!!! i hadn't thought about Oregon Trail since I was a kid. I loved that game. Does anyone know a site that you can download it from??
your boy susan
fucking awesome article
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Posted: 9/23/2005 10:56:05 AM
Quality - does anyone remember on the trail, when the image of the mother holding the baby flashed up, it kind of looked like her tit was hanging out, it was the baby's head - i think I may have gotten excited about that back then!
Matt
AWESOME!
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Posted: 9/23/2005 11:00:08 AM
That is Awesome! I have died so many times of cholera! That game and Carmen Sandiego were the best games of 1985!
Molly
I always shot the buffalo.
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Posted: 9/23/2005 11:55:17 AM
You could only carry back 99lbs worth of meat though, you know? I always thought that was such a rip off. Great article. Long live the trail.
Lorenzo
tight
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Posted: 9/23/2005 11:55:29 AM
Way to bring back arguably one of the best games ever. It makes me want to shoot a squirrel with a shotgun and feed my family with bite-sized chunks of fuzzy flesh.
JP
Great
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Posted: 9/23/2005 12:06:13 PM
Nice work. The game also taught respect for all levels of society. The banker might have had money, but he couldn't repair the wagon for shit if it broke. The carpenter on the other hand...
Rikku Markka
So much time spent playing
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Posted: 9/23/2005 12:56:43 PM
I remember playing this game in elemetary school. That's all we played in computer class. I always hated the fact that the family would need food, then I'd shoot a buffalo, and couldn't carry all the meat, and we'd be starving again.
Now, if someone would only write about the game King's Quest…
Mike S
KQ.exe
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Posted: 9/23/2005 1:35:24 PM
Which number?
Cameron
Excellent
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Posted: 9/23/2005 2:25:26 PM
Good Friday article. Takes me back.
Mike
PLAY ONLINE!!!
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Posted: 9/23/2005 3:11:19 PM
virtualapple.com
Eric Slinger
I LOVE MEN
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Posted: 9/23/2005 3:12:52 PM
I LOVE MEN SO MUCH AND OR E GAN TRAIL PLEASES ME AND MY LOVERS LOVE A BIG GAY AL IN TRAINING -- ES
ashlee
wow
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Posted: 9/23/2005 3:26:20 PM
definatly brings me right back to 3rd grade!
Jon Frit
wow
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Posted: 9/23/2005 3:45:07 PM
not cool guys that was really "condescending"
Truth
Kudos
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Posted: 9/23/2005 3:47:15 PM
"Basically he was the Mike Seaver of Brick Church Middle School."
Brilliant.
ps...ashlee, not unlike there being no "b" in the word "supposedly," there is no "a" in the word "definitely."
Murple
Wuss
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Posted: 9/23/2005 4:07:05 PM
Oregon trail with graphics? And a MOUSE?? Eesh! Thats not the REAL Oregon Trail. Those of us who grew up on the old 80s version would 0wn you wussy mouse shooters.
Katy
I had completely forgotten!
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Posted: 9/23/2005 4:09:30 PM
Thanks for reminding me of this! I can't believe I had forgotten about it. Very funny!
Neil Burns
Follow-up to the story
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Posted: 9/23/2005 4:45:18 PM
Later during recess Lauren Lackey sucked my cock behind the gym.
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