Posts: 8 Rank: 184
Member Since:
8/15/2006
Location:
Los Angeles, CA
Posted: 6/28/2007
Survey says....You're a Rampaging Homo!
"No bano."
"Hey, I said no bano, fucko. Beat it!"
God I hate you, John O' Hurley. If wishes came true you'd be having your colon cleansed with a chainsaw right now. I've got your overdramatic, condescending piece O' shit pity expression burned into my mind forever and it makes me want to puke bile from my eyes. Why aren't you the one fired for being on your stupid show? All you have to do is say "Survey says..." and point. How did you get that job? I bet your house is as big as an e...
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he just saw too much Tom Oatmeal success and tried to blend that into a hate fueled article, which just doesn't work. This should've just been a scathing rant about why that show sucks, there's plenty of reasons that he didn't get to
1. who and where are these hundred fucking surveyed people? and are they chained up somewhere back stage answering questions all day.
2. why do have the most annoying 1970s dressing family's on this show. I hate them. Can't we have like playboy bunnies vs. Maxim Models every week. I'd tune in for that shit.
3. yeah, be sure to interview each and every person in the family to find out some little gem about them. Like I give a shit. I don't even give my own family that kind of attention... for fucks sake avoiding that kind of boring bullshit is why I went to Vegas for thanksgiving last year.
4. a string of worse and worse fucking hosts - I don't need to go into much detail here, but if you're asked to host this show, just kill yourself.... seriously it doesn't get any lower. I'd rather be asked if I was involved in the prostitution ring from charlie's article than be asked to host the fued.
5. only having complete mental incompetents do the final battle thing, whatever the fuck it's called... that drains my will to live. OH MY GOD, THE PRESSURE!@@#$ seriously, just name a fruit that grows on trees you retard, it's not that hard. Do you really need all that time. I think they should add caning to this section of the show. Anytime you take more than 2 seconds to respond or repeat an answer already given BAM! right across your back. I'll bet you think of something other than apple right off the back. Especially knowing that you brother in law charlie, who went first is not really as "high functioning" as the doctor likes to claim.
Posts: 1164 Rank: 6 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
New York, NY
Posted: 6/28/2007 11:57:16 AM
I think he's referring to how the host would stop juuuust short ofmaking out with every female contestant right in front of their husbands/brothers/fathers.
We can only assume they fellated him backstage, but there isn't any of that on film...that I know of.
We surveyed 100 South Floridan poseurs, currently in denial about their sexual orientation. Top 5 answers on the board. Name something Ignorant Bastahhd casually "drops" into the conversation to impress the silicone bimboes over Jager Bombs at da club...
Posts: 2061 Rank: 1 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 6/28/2007 12:55:03 PM
1. 'Well, after law school......." 2. "after hours party at my pad, my maid spent all day cleaning" 3. "yep, I beat up that dude, oh and that dude over there, and that one, I just gave 'the look'". 4. "If you play your cards right, I might just name my boat after you". 5. "I haven't been with just 1 girl in a long time, so brace yourself".
Posts: 808 Rank: 11 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
two up two down, VA
Posted: 6/28/2007 12:58:45 PM
1. (to the bartender) hey cheif! i told you to make this jager-bomb top-shelf! 2. how much did your tits cost? 3. you're in luck, i only bang supermodels. 4. this club would be better in vegas 5. seriously, how fucking good looking am i?
1. "Then my roommate said, "let's take the convertible. And I was like, "which one"..."
2. "Do you know any good tax shelters?"
3. "Does these pants make my cock look huge?"
4. "Ha ha - yeah, "How I Met Your Mother' is really funny. You know who else funny? Shaq. We were chatting down at South Beach last weekend, you know, and he said..."
5. "So I gave the valet a $50 (he really gave him nothing, except attitude, of course), and he started doing the whole "search for the money self-pat-down thing." So I just said, "hey, champ, keep it - but take good care of my 944, s'alright?!' "
Posts: 303 Rank: 23 Joined:
12/8/2006
Location:
north babylon, NY
Posted: 6/28/2007 1:20:07 PM
1. I used to hangout with Vince and Owen, but those guys changed after they did Wedding Crashers. 2. Hold on...I'll get my driver on the phone. 3. What, no Blue Label? 4. You guys take Black Cards right? 5. Nah, just tweaked the shoulder a little bit. It's just an old college football injury.
"then clooney said he'd fly me out to the premier of Ocean's 13 in his jet, and I said I'd rather fly coach than catch a ride in your lear... I only ride in Gulfstream IVs or better."
"yeah that was me you saw on tv courtside at the Heat game, but I don't sit there anymore, I bought a skybox... can't be down there with the commoners anymore"
"So then Ashton showed up and I said we gotta roll, this place is letting anybody in"
"You've seen 'thank you for smoking'? Yeah, they did base that on me"
