Hi, my names Aaron Karo. You may know me from my side-splitting observation column Ruminations. I cover a wide variety of topics, including and limited to: NYC, L.A., and that I went to Penn. Lets face it, Im a catch.
I like to think of myself as a new generations Woody Allen- Ive got the annoying part down pat- but really, I see my career following in the footsteps of another comedic genius; Ray Romano. Much like Ray covers the mundane-yet-hysterical details of family life and is funny to no one under the age of 45, I cover the equally mundane and equally hysterical details of twenty something life, and am funny to everyone who thinks Ray Romano is funny.
Anyway, for the six of you out there who dont know who I am; let me get you up to speed. Im a New York boy, through and through. Thats A-number 1. I can talk about NYC day and night; everyone loves to hear about living in Manhattan, no matter where theyre from. I dont care how many times its been done before. Let me tell you, that is one c-raaazy place to be living as a twenty-something, man oh man. Unfortunately, most nights ended with a final inhibition-lowering Amstel light at 3:45 am, followed by me running ski poles on triplets #1 and #3, while triplet #2 made sweet love to my face. Theyre all doctors, by the way.
#2.) I went to Penn. Thats Ivy League.
#3.) After graduating from Penn and living in NYC, I moved to L.A., and let me tell you, this is one wacky, wacky place. Everybodys an actor, writer, or producer! Its just like Swingers, all the clichs are so true! You have to drive everywhere, you cant get any good Chinese food, and the women dont want any part of you unless you have an agent and a deal. Good thing I went to Penn and am a successful comedian. Lets face it, Im a catch.
As always, some things Ive been Ruminating on:
 | drive on a parkway, park in a driveway?! |
- Ive found its next to impossible finding a decent slice of pizza here in L.A. Last weekend I drove a few blocks to this place on Wilshire (pronounced "will-sure". wtf?) for a couple slices and when the girl handed them to me, I was like: I ordered pizza, not two slices of bread with ketchup and cheese on it!
- I think old age is catching up with me. The other day, I got home from a 1 oclock with my agent and the elevator was broken so I had to walk up three flights of stairs. When I reached my floor I was completely winded. My super happened to be in the hallway, so I say to him Hey, how about fixing the elevator? What, are you trying to kill me? Im 27, not 17!
- Girls in L.A. all have tiny little dogs they like to dress up and carry around with them. Its like they see them as accessories or something. Yesterday I saw these two girls walking down the street holding Chihuahuas that were wearing tee shirts. I felt like yelling at them, Those are dogs, not little babies!
- Finally, Ive found its a whole different ball game trying to pick up girls in L.A. vs. picking up girls in NYC. Mainly, theyre all gorgeous out here and unless you can offer something to really set you apart, you dont stand a chance. So, while talking to my stunning waitress at a lunch meeting (everyone does lunch meetings!), I found out she was also a New York transplant and was sick and tired of how fake all the guys are out here. So, I say, Im sick and tired of it too, what do you say we grab some pizza and walk up to my apartment to talk about it Hey-yo! Fuck me.
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