Tommy? Tommy Dolansky? Is that you, man? Damn, its been a long time. Whats up? You still working for your dad? What? Oh, thats right, I heard about that. Tough stuff. What was it again, ball cancer? Oh, thats right. Genocide. Sorry, guy.
Oh hey, speaking of your family, remember that time I fucked your sister? That was some funny shit, huh? Remember I was all pissed at you for not returning that pencil I lent you in Algebra, so I went over to the park where she was hanging out with some of her friends from JV cheerleading and I gave her some Night Train and then totally banged her? Like, hard. Like, right in the pussy!! Remember? Damn, that was classic! Paybacks a bitch, huh, Tommy?
But hey, thats the what high school was all about, right? Getting back at your boys by statutorily raping their sisters. Ahh, yeah!!
Hey, remember how I told her that Id always had this big crush on her and how I totally didnt have gonorrheaeven though I so did! Man, that was funny! I always meant to ask you if she ever got that cleared up. No? Ah, well.
Oh, hey, theres Rooney! Hey, Roon-dog, get over here, man! Tommy and I were just talking about that time I nailed his sister you remember that? What? Oh shit, thats right! She was your girlfriend at the time! I totally forgot about that! Man, were YOU pissed!!
Hey, remember how you started crying when she broke up with you? What? What do you mean, how would I know? Because I was there, motherfucker! It was at the Friendlys on Morris Avenue and I was ducked down in the next booth practically busting a gut! You were all crying and shit, saying how you were gonna find me and kill me. Meanwhile Im two feet away holding in my laughter by biting on one of the very same fingers I had just used to give your girlfriend the shocker! Beyond classic!! I cant believe you never knew that! Oh shit!
That No. 2 made you No. 1 -- on my shit list!
Hey, but thats what these get-togethers are for, right? Catching up on old times and maybe finding out some shit you never even knew about! Like me finding out that half the dudes on the baseball team never even knew about me fucking Tommys sister.
Seriously, I was just talking to Carter and Greenie and it turns out neither of them knew that I had popped Dolanskys sisters cherry. I mean, I couldve sworn I told all those guys like the next day. Hell, I passed around those naked pictures of her on the bus back from the St. Pauls game. I dont know, I guess they werent there that day or the day when I announced it over the loudspeaker during the Pledge of Allegiance.
Man, if only wed had the Internet back then, eh, boys? That wouldve taken our good-natured practical joking to a whole new level. Dudes in Tokyo wouldve been yanking their chopsticks to Dolanskys sisters tuna roll. And when I say tuna roll I mean her beaver, yknow? Holy shit, that wouldve been awesome! Hey, if I can find those pictures at home, you might be getting some pretty funny e-mails in the next few days, Tommy!
Oh hey, speaking of the Internet, remember that time I fucked Tommys sister? What? Oh, thats right we were just talking about that. Sorry, dudes. Ive been hanging with Jimmy Beam all day! I am so shit-faced!! Owwwwooooh!! Goddamit, Im fucking sweet!
What? Oh, right. Okay. Yeah, Ill keep it down. But dude, after Tommys mom finishes the eulogy, the bar is open, motherfuckers! The three of us are definitely hoisting a few in memory of Dolanskys sister. Hell, its the least I can do. I mean, I did fuck her.
YOU'RE BEING PLAGERIZED Posted: 4/22/2006by: anonymous hey just want to let you know some punk ass bitch is plagerizing your shit (along with other people's shit).
http://www.xanga.com/FISHITUP/475228553/remember-dat-time-i-fuked-ur-sister.html 1 funny mutha Posted: 4/16/2006by: chuck dude you are 1 funny mutha awesome Posted: 4/16/2006by: Holmes dude, who thought genocide could be so funny. . Posted: 4/15/2006by: . Wow. Groundbreaking stuff. Awesome Posted: 4/15/2006by: Local Cop's Cherry Top Good stuff. As strong as I've ever seen it from Mr. Sanford.
Great Article Posted: 4/13/2006by: Jason Mathews Funny Shit wrong formula for shocker Posted: 4/13/2006by: Posterior-fourchette it's two in the pink, one ON the buttonhole wrong formula for shocker Posted: 4/13/2006by: Posterior-fourchette it's two in the pink, one ON the buttonhole shut up Posted: 4/13/2006by: 90 police shut the fuck up about ur stupid guns and shit, it has fuck all relevence to the article, shut up Shotguns Posted: 4/12/2006by: AB Nope, never seen a slug that didn't dance over about 200'..... Even with a riffled barrel. And another point I'm making is that normally you sight in a scope at around 25 yards and allow for the trajectory drop in the vertical alignment. Besides that, slugs drop like bricks over longer shots....I bet when you look into the scope the cross-hairs are almost on the tip of the barrel. I don't even know why you would want to shoot a shotgun (even with a riffled barrel) on long shots anyway. Much less target practice at 100yrds. If you are really saying that you set up a target at 100yrds...... maybe you did, who knows. I can't say that the gun isn't capable, it is just a stretch for me to believe it. And a HUGE stretch to believe that two people are hunting with the same slugs. Long range shotgun hunting isn't common enough for more than one person to be doing it on one blog.........
